shut up about greek yogurt.

if i have to wait behind another unshaven scarf-wearing hipster with a cart full of this crap one more time you’re going to see mushroom clouds.  seriously, why the hell does everyone have such a hard-on for this stuff?  is it just clever marketing?  that’s my guess.  hell, john stamos could sell BLTs in jerusalem, so it’s no surprise he’s hauling in bags of cash hawking yogurt. uncle jesse has to make bank somehow, and writing jingles only ever worked for one guy.

greece has just flat out been a bad time for the last couple thousand years.  the last greek anyone cared about – besides the aforementioned mullet avatar – was probably aristotle, and even he thought it was ok for a man to be in love with a little boy.  last time i checked, their economy – hell, their country in general – is circling the drain.  but hey, let’s stop everything and eat their yogurt.  puppets.

really though, for the love of whichever deity has to listen to your prayers, please, eat something else.  i promise people will still be impressed with you and think you’re enlightened if you eat a banana or a burrito.  you can still discuss your awful band and talk about nanobreweries or your loft apartment. 

thank you for cooperating.


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